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Screw the Women and Children!

June 22, 2011

The tornado of '11 left Smashing taking cover to save the fabric

When the power went out we thought the end was near.

If you live near Chicago, you know that there were tornado Warning and Watches galore last night. Since we work around the clock, chances are that we were together strategizing for our global takeover. It just so happened to be that we were thankfully meeting at Smashing’s Southern Campus location where we house the fabric that we use to make our apparel.

As we were sitting at JD’s 200 year-old antique kitchen table, Spinner forgot the three-hour lecture we had about proper behavior near the table given at our first meeting at the Southern Campus location over two years ago. JD poured each of us a glass of wine (although it took some convincing as Spinner and JD have a match today and they thought it would be in their game’s best interest not to drink…not much convincing, just a “Really?” from me and they were bottoms up) and we sat at the table. Now JD had the table basically lined with coasters, but Spinner found the one 4 square inch area to place her glass. Before JD could notice, I shot Spinner a glare and threw a coaster at her like a Ninja Star.

As we were concluding our meeting, I was distracted with the ominous sky. Spinner could care less and JD decided to put on the radio to listen for any Warnings. I kept getting up evaluating the situation then sitting back down. When we felt and heard a weird noise like a drop in cabin pressure, I was ready to head to the bunker. Spinner on the other hand said that we were over-reacting and it looked like there was a light breeze outside. Dramatically, I pointed out that this type of attitude towards the fury of Mother Nature is what leads to lives being lost and I got a huge eye roll. After I informed everyone, that I recently was re-certified in CPR, I got an even bigger eye roll.

JD did have all of us including two boys proceed to the basement. The Weather Channel was on and beeping with alerts constantly. When I saw the Tornado Watch turn to a Warning, I tried to shuffle everyone into the bathtub. Spinner was having none of it and I was not comforted by the fact that JD’s youngest son informed me that if the power goes out and we are stuck here for days that their family would have to eat Spinner and I to survive. I was comforted by the fact that her older son with the obvious manners taught properly by his mother offered us a beer from the mini-fridge in the basement to which we were taking shelter near. Now that is a sign of a good upbringing, being hospitable even in a crisis.

Now when the power goes out, I basically start shrilling with hysteria until JD slaps me to bring me back to my senses. Spinner is still giggling to herself amused with the humor of the situation until we all realize simultaneously that we could have a serious problem if anything happens to our fabric. We run to the Smashing Warehouse, conveniently located near the bunker, and throw ourselves over it to protect it. Screw the Women and Children, we need to save the Fabric!

Things finally calmed down and we cautiously drove home. I lead in front of Spinner and JD’s neighborhood looks like a war zone. With an “I told you so” motion, I roll down my window and show Spinner the garbage can that fell over and the tree branches as big as my arm lining the street…and she thinks I was over reacting!

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